ALF Meets William Hung
by I'm Gary Coleman
Summary: This is what happens when that famous alien from Melmac meets that famous American Idol reject.
1. The Meeting

"Yes!" said Alf when Kate left to do some errands. This was his chance to devour that cake that Kate had made for Lynn's birthday. He ran into the kitchen and opened up the refrigerator to discover a note that read: YOU SERIOUSLY THINK THAT I'D LEAVE YOU ALONE WITH CAKE? I KNOW YOU TOO WELL. – KATE.

"Ha! She does!" laughed Alf. He decided that he'd order donuts instead, so he decided to call a donut place that delivers. He placed an order for two dozen jelly donuts with frosting and then sat on the couch to watch his favorite show, Polka Jamboree. After about ten minutes of laughing his ass off, there was a ring at the doorbell. Alf got up to answer it.

"Hello," said an Asian man. "Here's your order." He held out the bag of donuts.

Alf just started at him. He recognized him from somewhere…he just couldn't tell exactly where. Then, in the background, Polka Jamboree began playing "She Bangs" by Ricky Martin. It suddenly clicked, "YOU'RE WILLIAM HUNG!"

"Yes, here's your order."

"Why are you working as a donut delivery guy? You are the most talented singer I've ever seen. I would've voted for you!"

"Take your order!"

Alf grabbed the donut bag, as well as William and dragged them into the house. "Wait here," Alf ordered. He ran into the kitchen, and a minute later returned with jelly all over his fur and donut boxes all over the floor.

"Can I leave?" asked William.

"No!" said Alf. "Serenade me first."

"Ok, but keep in mind, I'm giving it my hardest and I will have no regrets at all." And then he sang "She Bangs" for Alf. Alf looked at him in pure awe.

"That was amazing…" he said. "Why did you lose to that woman with the cartoony voice?"

"Because my major, my, my, my major is civil engineering."

"Huh?"

"Simon hated me," William said.

That was getting really long so I ended it. There'll be a new chapter soon.


	2. The Kidnapping

LAST TIME IN ALF MEETS WILLIAM HUNG: Alf ordered donuts and found a surprise at the front door.

"How can Simon hate such a talented singer?" Alf asked.

William just started at Alf giving him that _Are you retarded?_ look.

"Oh, whatever, I'm gonna go finish watching Polka Jamboree and try to eat Lucky."

"Ok bye, bye," William said and started to leave.

"Wait," Alf yelled, running over to William. "You can't leave! You have to sing for Willie first!"

"Sing to who?"

"My buddy Willie! He's always hated your singing, but I know that if he hears you in person he might reconsider."

"Oh ok," said William. "But I gotta be leaving at seven because I have a recording session."

"A singer and a donut delivery guy! Some people have all the luck," Alf said to himself.

"Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha," William laughed, in his unique fashion.

A few hours passed. Alf watched the rest of Polka Jamboree, a Melmacian Beauty Pagent (Very different than the ones here, there the judges are the ones wearing the swimsuits and doing their talents), and that soap opera that he used to write for. The whole time William was upstairs in Brian's room playing with his Pokemon cards. Then, Willie's car drove up.

"Hi Alf," Willie said as he emerged through the door carrying a grocery bag.

"Hey Willie," Alf said. Then he grabbed the bag from Willie's hand and ran into the kitchen.

"ALF! I TOLD YOU TO STOP TAKING THE GROCERIES AND POURING EVERYTHING IN YOUR MOUTH! WE DON'T WANT THE LIQUID PLUMBER INCIDENT TO HAPPEN AGAIN!"

"I'm not eating anything," Alf said and then burped. "Well, maybe those cookies, but I'm just getting some food for my friend."

"You don't have any friends," Willie said. "No one even knows you exist."

"HEY! I had lots of friends on Melmac! I was a party animal!"

"I better go upstairs and see this," Willie said and started up the stairs.

"Ok, good, because my friend wants to sing to you," Alf said as he followed him up. "He's in Brian's room."

Willie opened to door to find William on the floor, staring at a rare sparkly Pokemon card. Willie looked stunned to see this C list celebrity in his son's room. "Do you know that this is the rare Shmeetatazard?" William said holding up the card.

"Why are you in my son's room?" Willie asked.

"I am not particularly sure," William answered. "I was just delivering some donuts here and then that cat with the big nose forced me to stay."

"ALF," William yelled. "Why did you kidnap William Hung!"

"What can I say, he's my idol. I'm sure if Sigorny Weaver came here, you'd kidnap her."

"No I wouldn't," Willie said. "I have respect for people and you should too."

"William, sing for him," Alf commanded.

"If you could trade me this card," William said clutching the card.

"Yeah, whatever take it," Alf said.

"Ok," William said. He stuck the card in his pocket and then sang "She Bangs" to Willie. Willie looked less than impressed. Alf watched holding his hands together, with his eyes wide open and his mouth opened. When William finished Alf shouted, "Bravo! Bravo! Encore!"

"No, really, that's enough," Willie said. "Thank you William, you can leave now."

"Ok, bye," William said and walked out of Brian's room. Willie walked into his room and started reading some science magazine. Alf grabbed his harpoon and rope and snuck up behind William, harpooned him, and covered his mouth. He pushed William into the bathroom and closed the door.

Inside Willie's room, Willie decided that he needed to relieve his self, so he started walking towards the bathroom. Alf was inside with William, and he was tying him to the shower door, and he had tied his mouth closed with a towel. Willie knocked on the door. "OCCUPIED!" shouted Alf.

Haha. I just need to stick in "occupied" somewhere, since that's my favorite Alf quote. I shall add a new chapter soon.


End file.
